284 Plays

in love, I’ve always been a mercenary, but i never leave my post when the cash runs out

I want to make you quiver

Make your backbone shiver

Hey kid, take the stage and deliver

(Source: bandfolks, via panicatthediscow)


Arctic Monkeys’ Cassetes

Arctic Monkeys’ Cassetes

(Source: blue-moon-carol, via prettyoddyoungblood)

missallegra:

Dumbledore: “and with 350 points Slytherin wins the house cup

But I have a few extra points to give out

500 points to Dumbledore for being the best headmaster”

*house flags all change to Dumbledore’s face*

(via worthyourweightinfanfiction)

angel-and-hunters:

smaugwithablog:

wwwgoodreads:

sqwhoretle:

turntechdestiel:

thepondseleven:

harry-p-ron-w:

amoying:

nasturbate:

marshtomping:

nasturbate:

(white girl voice) wait lemme go to the bathroom

are you saying only females of the white race urinate

yes

i am an asian female and i can back this up, i havent urinated since 1902

How old r u

17

*whispers* how long have you been 17

I know what you are

Say it.Say it out loud.

WILDCATS

WHAT IS GOING ON WITH THIS POST.

(Source: nasturbate, via jackassbassambarakat)

porrim-some-sugar-on-me:

lock-lamora:

duhpercy:

ads for pads these days are all about how thin and discreet pads are and how no one will ever be tell you’re wearing them wELL HOW ABOUT YOU MAKE THE PACKAGING QUIETER BECAUSE THERE’S NO FUCKING POINT IN HAVING A THIN DISCREET PAD WHEN EVERYONE CAN HEAR YOU RIPPING ONE OPEN IN THE SCHOOL BATHROOM

Use the men’s room they won’t expect it

'Who the fuck is eating chips in here?'

(via howdidigetsofunny)

geekycuttlefish:

apatheticghost:

nearly every family on disney channel

  • goofy dumb parent(s)
  • naive older brother who is nice but a total idiot and is often the butt of the joke
  • sister who is the main character and thought of as the only sane member of the character and also has very good grades but may be a bit uptight
  • younger sibling who is an evil mastermind and always has some sort of scheme to profit off something

Don’t forget the sassy poc best friend of the main character

(via laughbitches)